A Snowman and a Nun walk into a bar…

The Snowman turns to the Nun and says “Hey, what are you doing in here?” The nun says “It’s a habit.”

Here we have some lovely and highly collectable items! A small vase in the shape of a Nun suitable for cut flowers or pens or other random stuff that you might need to keep all in one place. And a very cool (get it?) Snowman mug. The snowman mug has this special feature where his top hat comes off and works as a lid so you can keep you hot beverages hotter longer. Whatever clever person designed this deserves some kind of award. He also has a bonus detachable spoon so you can stir up that powdery hot coco mix that always floats to the top. These two come as a pair and all yours for the bargain price of FREE. Drop me a line and I’ll meet up with you in the heart of Park Slope Sunday March 4th. Pick up only, Sorry but I will not be mailing these or meeting you at the Wonder Wheel in Coney Island or at the top of the Empire State building.

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(Ten months ago I posted the nun three different times and it was “flagged and removed” within minutes each time. So this time I took a slightly more wholesome approach and don’t mention adultery or being saved for your sins by having this collectible nun vase in your home. It seemed to work better. Craigslist always amuses me when my posts for FREE stuff gets removed, because really my ceramic nun is offensive? Maybe those people should click on over to the personal ads and see what the real definition of offensive is. You could probably even find a real nun and a guy willing to dress up as a snowman, just sayin’.)

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I want the nun!!!!!!!!
-robert

Robert, sadly I need you to try a little harder. While I do love exclamation points just because you use 8 of them does not mean you can have the nun. Oh and they are a couple, till death do them part! Geez Robert.

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we would love this . thanks . Peter

Really, Peter? That’s all you’ve got? Very disappointing. C-

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Very clever posting……..Im sure you got lots of responses……as they  say, its all in the marketing! -Gus

Thank you Gus. I appreciate your compliment.

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HI I COULD USE THIS I LIKE IT SO PLEASE  LET ME NO WHERE TO PICK UP OK LIZ

DEAR LIZ, STOP SHOUTING AT ME. All caps and no periods. So loud. And it’s not a this, it’s a these. So no.

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These are ‘chill’!
If still available, I’m interested! And can meet at Prospect Park later today.

Thanks,
Alida

I thought it was a little funny with the ‘chill, I assumed a pun on the snowman. But my schedule did not accommodate meeting in the park to exchange a nun and a snowman. So I declined. Not that I told her that. Also my friends get mad when I meet strangers in the park. Safety first blah, blah, blah.

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Hi, i was very entertained by your introduction. You sold me at subject. No kidding. i am madly in love with the nun, if you still have it. And of course the snowman has to be there. Do you still have it? Can i pick it up on Monday? I work weekend ( very sad job) Thanks!

E.

Ah, and we have a winner or a loser depending on how you look at it.

 

I respond:

Actually yes, they are still waiting to go to a good home.

Are you a good home?

I’m available Monday after 6. Are you in Brooklyn?

Hi, yes i live in Brooklyn. After 6 is good. I am the best home they can find. You are in park slope right? Any coffee shop in park slope would do. You know it’s not the best way to be killed over two porcelain dolls. Thank you!

E.

(I know it’s the right person because he/she mentions murder in the response. I thought that was funny. Does that make me crazy? Though his assumption was that I was the killer and mine was that he/she was.)

So I wrote back and told him/her to meet me at the designated pick up spot in the slope and he didn’t show. What the hell. I waited around. Then I left, ticked. I’m giving you something FREE don’t stand me up. So I went home and ate some dinner and cried. (not really) But later that evening I got the apology email.

Hi. sorry. I swear i am not pure scam. Here is what happened. I pulled all nighter yesterday. And was supposed to take an hour nap before reading your email. Woke up after 7. and i had two email. Partially thought you wouldn’t go anywhere since i didn’t confirm. I am sorry. I feel so bad. Are we through? Do i still have chance? Thanks!

E.

One more chance buddy, one more chance.

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Hooray! She showed up tonight. She was very apologetic about sleeping through our meet up last night. (Partially my fault for not confirming) The only slight snafu was that she was super modest, shy, and a little creeped out. I had to pull out my best lines “Come on, all the cool kids are doing it. It’s just one time. What could happen?” Totally did not work. Alright so I guess the concept might be a little creepy, but totally fun right? Right?  So in the end we compromised and her mittens were pretty cool anyway and she was very sincerely fond of the nun and I was not about to re-post all this on Craigslist. I can not disclose what she will be doing with the snowman but let’s just say Frosty might be counting down to meltdown. 

Mystery Girl